Wednesday, August 4, 2010


my mother was a beautiful lady.
she loved to cook and she loved children.
mother provided child care out of her home.
she really injoyed the children under her care.
she would school them, take them on field trips, and let them help make their snacks and lunches.
every waking moment mother would be active around the house.
she always kept our house clean and taught her children the importance of clean living and hygene.
we had to make our beds every morning.
she would have our laundry done and every day after school no matter what we had a hot meal waiting for us.
mother was a strict disiplinary.
her decisions were final and we followed and never backed talk.
she ruled with love, wise words, and she didnt spare the rod.
if u cursed at an adult or continued to under achieve in class u just might get a spanking.
these spankings never really hurt physically but were more of a tool to get your attention.
a tool that mother used to show us that "when she says do better, she meant that".
mother was very religious and attended church every sunday.
mother sung in the choir and my sisters and i sung in the youth choir.
i didnt care for church, as a youth it was scary to me.
i never understood what the preacher was talking about, there would sometimes be someone crying.
and i had a bad experince at church.
one sunday my sisters and i went to church with our grandmother.
we went to the church that grandmother attends.
i was about 8-9yrs old.
i have an uncle one yr older and an uncle one yr younger then me.
the preacher made a cross on their forehead with what i learned later was olive oil, then tapped their forehead and they both started dancing and "speaking in tounge".
well i wanted to speak in tounge and dance too.
one my aunt said "they are filled with the holy ghost".
the preacher performed the same thing on me but i didnt feel the holy ghost.
he tried again and i still didnt feel it.
my grandmother says " dont worry about him he is filled with the devil".
i was so scared hearing her say that.
years later as grown men i asked my uncle about that day and he said that they would act like they were "filled with the holy spirit so that they would be allowed to go outside and play after church.
but going to mothers church was a whole different experience.
mother made everything fun and a learning experience.
i was a mothers boy and i was always picked on by cousins and other family for always being "up under yo moma".
but i was facinated by everything about my mother.
even as a grown man i would call her everyday just to talk or ask for a recipe.
evey time mother bought new living furniture she call me to see if i wanted the old furniture.
my sisters were really mad about that and would ask me why i get such beautiful furniture.
when mother went to heaven it was the worst day of my life.
i told my sisters that i cant go to the funeral.
they understood and called me when it was over.
i didnt want that memory of my mother in death.
now i only can visualize mother talking, cooking, and playing.
later my sisters called me to have mothers furniture saying that "we all know that mother would have wanted me to have it".
it was one of the kindest acts of love ever.
two weeks after her death mother visited me in my sleep and said " son im doing fine, im with Morton and im fine".
that put me at ease.
but i still have days when i think about her and have to find a place were i can be alone and cry, cry, cry.
in the dictionary under "MOtHER" is her photo.

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